Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Let My Life Be Lifted High

Spiritually I have been on somewhat of a roller coaster. I spent the first 5 years of marriage ministering to some AMAZING high school students, who are now, great friends and people who are going to change the world in many ways. It was honestly the highlight of my life so far.

As life was changing, so was the direction God was taking my husband and I. I resigned from my teaching position, quit leading Young Life, became a mom, and supported my husband in his adventure of a new company. However, through these changes and over the course of the past 4 years I haven't been able to shake the feeling that there is SO MUCH MORE that God calls me to. I know it, I read about it, I listen to great sermons about it, I pray about it, I spoke about it at a women's retreat, I have a deep desire for it...I just don't feel like I should be doing any of it right now.

It sounds easy, right, keep plugging away at being an inspiring mom, a supportive, loving wife, and a child of God looking for random ways to minister to those that come into my path. However, I just feel like there is so much more. I am trying to be content with where God has me (although I am always thinking about where He is going to take me). I am trying to be the best mother that I can be to my children (feeling like I fail most of the time). I desire to be the most supportive wife on the planet (definitely fail in that category). I feel like I am so open and willing to learn and get so much from each moment He teaches me, I just feel like I sit on the wisdom He gives me at this point in my life.

Patience. Contentment. Willingness. Faithfulness. Prolonged Passion.

I will continue to learn great truths, filing them away, waiting for the moments that God asks me to use them to change lives, speak truth, or adequately portray the wisdom He has given me. I know He has a purpose for what He does. I know He has a time in which He desires to show His glory. I know He has the perfect way to portray this through me. During this time, I desire to remain patient, content, willing, faithful, passionate, and open to what He has to teach me NOW.

Help me Lord to wait on YOU!!!

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